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20 Things I Have Learned from My Cancer Journey

Mary Trouba, a patient with metastatic inflammatory breast cancer, talks about the 20 things she has learned on her own cancer journey.

Since being diagnosed with metastatic inflammatory breast cancer in November 2015, I have been writing about my experiences with cancer and cancer treatment as a way to grapple with the ways this journey touches my life. For me, it is a way of “metabolizing” my experience, of feeling at home in my own skin.

#1: Things can change at any moment.

#2: Hope is a choice.

#3: Statistics don’t tell you how your personal situation will unfold.

#4: You get to decide how much you want to disclose to others and how you want to deal with uncertainty.

#5: You change in subtle ways over time when you viscerally confront your mortality; you don’t suddenly become a completely different person.

#6: There are more people walking around with late stage cancer than you might realize, given ongoing advances in cancer research and treatment in recent years.

#7: The world of cancer treatment involves a mix of good news and bad news.

#8: A positive outlook includes feeling whatever it is you are feeling in the moment, and sometimes it makes sense to temporarily compartmentalize grief and anxiety and go back to them when it feels right.

#9: Doctors and nurses who work in oncology are very special people.

#10: You never know who will show up for you at a particular moment.

#11: Practical support means a lot.

#12: Friends and family who make you laugh are precious.

#13: Eyelashes have as much to do with how you look as does the hair on your head.

#14: A harmonious home environment soothes the brain during chemo fog.

#15: You feel better when you are well-hydrated.

#16: Doing what is important to you, no matter how eccentric or unimportant it might seem to others, is worth prioritizing.

#17: Grace is a gift— it visits at unexpected times.

#18: Images of angelic beings and spirit guides are hardwired into us as human beings.

#19: Dreams become more comforting as the journey progresses.

#20: The opportunity to be here on planet Earth is a big deal .

When Art Captures the Cancer Experience

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Mother with Stage 4 Breast Cancer and Her Family 'Focus on the Living'

Christina McAmis’ cancer journey began when she found a lump while breastfeeding. The attorney and mother of three tells the “Cancer Horizons” podcast what the last nine years have been like for her and her family.

Sharing Breast Cancer Experiences is the ‘Most Special Thing’

Having social media platforms to share breast cancer experiences changes the narrative for others who may empathize, a survivor and advocate said.

I'm Still Me Even Though I Have Myeloma

When I told my friends and family I have multiple myeloma, some of them didn't know what to do.

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My Cancer Journey

My Breast Cancer Journey

Hanna-Marie lives in Houston, Texas. She was diagnosed with breast cancer in December 2020. This is her story in her words.

I was diagnosed with a type of breast cancer called triple positive invasive ductal carcinoma on Dec. 15, 2020. I had no family history.

I found a mass in mid-September 2020 that felt like a pencil eraser. During this time, I was having horrible nausea and pelvic pain weeks after my cycle and ovulation period. This was out of the norm for me, even during my cycle. I was one of the lucky ones with no cramps or nausea.

I went to the OBGYN in late September to discuss the nausea and pelvic pain and totally forgot to discuss the mass. I received a pelvic ultrasound and was told there weren’t any abnormalities. My well women’s exam was due in late October, so I waited until then to alert my doctor about the mass. Her saying is, “If you feel something, we without a doubt do a mammogram.” I’m 35 years old, so I had never received a mammogram before.

Due to work schedule and scheduling with the imaging center, I didn’t get the mammogram until November 2020. I received a mammogram and a breast ultrasound. Three masses were discovered that required a biopsy, which I had in early December. A week later the biopsy results revealed:

• Estrogen receptor-positive
• Progesterone receptor-positive
• Her2-positive

The best advice I can give to someone newly diagnosed is to:

• Take it one step at a time. It can be overwhelming to hear you need chemotherapy, surgery, radiation therapy. After treatment, there’s hormone therapy for years. Don’t think about the next step until it’s time.
• Take time to review your health insurance benefits—you would be surprised at what things can be covered with a cancer diagnosis. For instance, acupuncture wasn’t covered with my plan unless there was proof of a chronic illness such as cancer.
• Trust your gut and don’t be forced into something that doesn’t feel right for you.
• Advocate for yourself—no one else will take care of you like you can. Speak out of something isn’t right and remember: closed mouths don’t get fed.
• Don’t be scared to ask questions!

As of August 2021, I am Cancer Free!

Statements and opinions expressed are that of the individual and do not express the views or opinions of Susan G. Komen. This information is being provided for educational purposes only and is not to be construed as medical advice. Persons with breast cancer should consult their healthcare provider with specific questions or concerns about their treatment.

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It’s Important to Share the Story of Your Cancer Journey

Share your experience. Tell your story so people undergoing treatment can better understand the journey that lies ahead—help them cope with their diagnosis.

Wherever you are on your cancer journey—whether you are a patient, a family member or a loved one of someone dealing with head and neck cancer—we want to hear your story. Help other people undergoing treatment and caregivers cope with their diagnosis. Share your experience so they can better understand the journey that lies ahead.

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Consent & Release I hereby consent, and grant Thyroid Head and Neck Cancer Foundation (“THANC”) permission, to identify me as a patient of physicians and other healthcare providers affiliated with THANC, by signs, name cards or other means, and on the Head and Neck Cancer Guide website and THANC Foundation website. I further consent, and grant THANC explicit permission, to use my name and likeness in photographs; video and/or or other digital and hard copy recordings; broadcasts and/or image preservation in digital or paper-based reproductions; in any and all of its publications; in posts on social media including, but not limited to Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Google+; in entries on its websites including, but not limited to the Head and Neck Cancer Guide website, without payment or any other consideration; and explicitly waive any and all royalties and any and all other forms of compensation.

I understand that, although THANC will endeavor to use my name and likeness in accordance with standards of good judgment, THANC cannot warranty or guarantee that any further dissemination of my likeness and/or image in digital and/or hard-copy reproductions will be subject to THANC supervision or control, or that such dissemination will be in compliance with applicable federal and/or state laws and regulations. Accordingly, I release, hold harmless and indemnify THANC from any and all liability related to use and/or dissemination of my name, likeness and/or image.

Writing Prompts

If you are not sure where to begin, use these ideas to get your thoughts flowing.

How has your life, outlook, or priorities changed as a result of your experience with cancer?

Consider your mindset, daily routines, relationships, and life goals. Were there any drastic shifts or subtle changes over time? How do you view your life and the world around you differently than before your diagnosis?

Offer one piece of advice to someone at the beginning of this journey.

Reflect on what you wish you had known at the start of your journey. What has been the most helpful or encouraging insight you’ve gained? This could be practical advice or emotional guidance.

Describe a time since the diagnosis that you have felt powerful and strong.

Was there a moment during your treatment or recovery when you overcame a significant hurdle, reached a milestone, or simply felt empowered despite the circumstances? Share the context, feelings, and why it was meaningful for you.

How do you feel about the changes cancer has brought into your life?

This could be an opportunity to share complex feelings, the challenges, and perhaps unexpected positives. How have you adapted and what have you learned about yourself?

Describe what gives you hope.

What or who inspires you to keep going? It could be a person, a future goal, a quote, an activity, or small everyday joys. How does this source of hope influence your perspective and resilience?

Talk about your coping mechanisms.

What techniques, hobbies, practices, or routines have helped you cope with the stress and uncertainty of your cancer journey? These might include meditation, art, music, reading, nature walks, etc.

Discuss how your diagnosis has influenced your relationships.

Has your experience brought you closer to certain people in your life, or has it led to unexpected challenges? Share how cancer has reshaped your connections and interactions with others.

What is 30 Stories in 30 Days™ & #ThankfulThursday?

As part of our on-going effort to spread awareness, we are always accepting submissions for our 30 Stories in 30 Days™ and #ThankfulThursday awareness campaigns. Each post will share a story written by an individual, family or organization affected by head & neck or thyroid cancer.

Both campaigns share first-hand experiences with cancer survivors . We understand the profound impact a cancer diagnosis can have on your life. Whether you are a survivor, caregiver, friend, or employee of a health care related company, your insight is valuable and can help others along this journey.

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Lessons From My Cancer Journey

A personal perspective: hard lessons for a reluctant learner..

Posted August 18, 2022 | Reviewed by Gary Drevitch

After being diagnosed with head and neck cancer in February 2021 and overcoming the shock of what was in store for me, I realized that I had embarked on a journey that I hadn’t planned on taking. The journey would be arduous, comprised of hazardous twists and turns and lessons I hadn’t expected or thought I needed to learn.

I also learned that my cancer was going to be my teacher, and it had no regard for students who displayed a reluctance to learn or whether or not I grew tired from the difficult journey as it would unfold.

My cancer was a harsh and severe teacher; unmerciful, unkind, and unrelenting. Early on, I realized that the metaphor of a war or battle didn’t capture what I was experiencing.

I am writing this about my experience because others can benefit from the lessons I’ve learned. These lessons are especially important for men. Like me, most men are socialized to be stoics: to tough it out when things are hard, to not ask for help even when we desperately need it, and to not seek medical help even when the signs of trouble are clear. As you will see, I learned to reject stoicism and embrace my vulnerability.

I came to think of my cancer as a teacher, one who was a lot like my freshman philosophy professor. He was the quintessential New England Ivy League professor: tweed jacket, wire-rimmed glasses, and a dour expression of judgment permanently on his unfriendly face. Never warm or friendly, he was consistently stern and serious. He approached teaching and his students as if administering a form of punishment in each lecture, and he did so without a hint of compassion.

This professor enjoyed utilizing the Socratic method when teaching. He took special delight in cold-calling on students, especially those who appeared distracted or unprepared. He did not care if his pointed yet thoughtful questions left an uncertain or unprepared student embarrassed or ashamed; that was the point of the questioning. Whether you were prepared, sleepy , distracted, or not, he was there to deliver a set of lessons through a series of probing questions that pushed us to think in ways our young minds were often not ready for.

I found that my cancer lessons were a lot like my experience in freshman philosophy, except I hadn’t chosen to take the course. For some reason, I was required to take this journey and compelled to learn the lessons along the way. Like my professor, my cancer teacher had no patience for unprepared students.

“Why me?” I thought as my cancer journey commenced. I soon came to realize how stupid the question was. My cancer teacher could care less if I felt sorry for myself or if I thought having this disease was unfair. There would be no time for wallowing in self-pity on my cancer journey, and the lessons I would be forced to learn along the way would be taught without patience or compassion. My first lesson was that “why me” was the wrong question.

In her book, Illness as Metaphor (1978), Susan Sontag wrote:

Everyone who is born holds dual citizenship, in the kingdom of the well and in the kingdom of the sick. Although we all prefer to use the good passport, sooner or later each of us is obliged, at least for a spell, to identify ourselves as citizens of that other place.

When I was diagnosed with cancer in February 2021, I began my journey to the kingdom of the sick. I hoped I would merely be a tourist passing through, unlike others I had known who became permanent residents in that horrid and unforgiving land.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, six in every 10 adults in the United States have a chronic disease. Four in 10 have two illnesses or more. I had no desire to become a member of this sickly tribe, but here I was.

Pedro Antonio Noguera, Ph.D., is the Emery Stoops and Joyce King Stoops Dean of the Rossier School of Education and a Distinguished Professor of Education at the University of Southern California.

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My Cancer Is Not A 'Journey'. Here Are Some Other Words I'm Happy To Use

North of England Correspondent, Senior Editor, HuffPost UK

When Jenny Watts hears someone describing cancer as a “journey”, she feels like hurling something at the television in rage.

Jenny, who is in her 30s, is undergoing treatment for breast cancer and says even at the time of diagnosis, the specialist told her it was the start of her journey and the word made her “want to scream.”

“To me, journeys are fun and pleasurable and things you have control over,” she tells HuffPost UK. “For me personally, the correct metaphor to describe cancer would be a rollercoaster because there’s so many ups and downs.”

Jenny, who lives in Lancaster and teaches English as a second language to university students , was diagnosed with cancer at the age of 34 after she went shopping for a sports bra. Under the bright lights of the changing room, she noticed a shadow and dimpling on her breast. Within 24 hours, she had an appointment with her GP and was sent to hospital for scans and tests.

As she was young and healthy, Jenny remembers hospital staff being polite and efficient, but thinks they weren’t really expecting there to be something wrong. However, she recalls their reactions changing when they looked at the scans. She was told to return in a week’s time and bring someone with her. It was on this visit that the cancer specialist used the word “journey”.

“I can completely understand why he said ‘journey’ as he meant it was the start of a long slog” says Jenny. “But for me, it was the wrong language.”

Since her diagnosis, Jenny has had surgery, chemotherapy and radiotherapy and is currently having injections every four weeks, which she will need for at least another year. She will then have to take tablets every day for 10 years to help prevent the cancer coming back. Her experience of treatment made the rollercoaster analogy most apt, she says – “the ups and downs; the fear; the nausea; the vomiting.”

The words of a perceptive nurse at the time of her diagnosis have also stayed with her. “She told me I would hear a lot of ‘be positive’ type remarks. But she said it would be a challenge just getting through day-to-day experiences so I should just be authentic and true to myself.

“I thought this was a brilliant thing to say to me and it felt really freeing.”

“I can’t imagine ever feeling I'm ‘all-clear’... cancer will always be a part of my life whether I like it or not.”

Jenny doesn’t like to think of herself “fighting” or “battling” cancer, but knows other people find that language empowering. “I don’t feel like I ‘battled. I just turned up for my appointments and did as I was told. From my perspective, I think the ‘fight’ comes later on after you have been through all the treatment.”

Even the word “survivor” makes her uncomfortable, despite it often being used with the best of intentions. “It makes me feel uncomfortable as I am still going through it.” she says. “When people ask if I have had the ‘all-clear’, it implies it is over. Cancer is no longer a death sentence. But I can’t imagine ever feeling I am ‘all-clear’ because of how young I was when I was diagnosed. Cancer will always be a part of my life whether I like it or not.”

Jenny realised she wasn’t alone in her strong reactions to cancer language when she attended a Cancer Metaphor workshop at Lancaster University .

“I tend to use metaphors and similes that relate to everyday experiences,” she says of her own preferences. ” I describe feeling like I’ve had my batteries removed – when I have no energy or don’t feel like myself after treatment. Or I say it’s like having the world’s worst hangover or the feeling after working a night shift when people feel groggy and don’t really know what’s going on.

“I also compare the mental fog and extreme fatigue of treatment to the sleep deprivation of caring for young children, based on conversations with friends and my sister-in-law. My friends and family could all relate to feeling like a complete zombie so making everyday comparisons was useful.”

One particular comment at the workshop stuck with her, says Jenny, even making her laugh. One participant said: “Cancer is like an unexpected lodger who turns up, messes everything up and causes chaos. Then just when you finally get rid of them and close the door, you realise they’ve kept the key.”

Based on workshops and interviews, researchers at Lancaster University have developed the first manual of cancer expressions to help patients make sense of their disease. The Metaphor Menu For People Living With Cancer takes in the views of more than 100 people involved in cancer care, from patients with advanced cancer to family carers and healthcare staff including oncologists.

M ore than one million words were analysed, including on online forums, with fairground rides, music and difficult journeys among the most common metaphors on the menu, which was developed with the help of Royal Preston Hospital, St John’s Hospice in Lancaster and charity CancerCare.

The research recommends that doctors and the media avoid portraying cancer as a ‘battle’, but researchers stressed there should be no blanket ban on certain words with patients encouraged to use those that best suit them.

“Describing someone as a ‘fighter’ can be upsetting for some patients but empowering for others."” - Prof Elena Semino from Lancaster University

“Our study shows that metaphors are helpful when talking about cancer,” says lead author Prof Elena Semino from Lancaster University’s department of linguistics and English language. “But different ones suit different people, or the same person at different times.” Describing a patient as a ‘fighter’ can be upsetting for some but empowering for others, for example.

“Some patients said that if they don’t get better, they feel guilty if they are seen as ‘losing the battle’,” she says. ” Some people don’t want the role of a fighter or the concept of ‘fighting with their own body.’ But others said they found it empowering and meaningful to see themselves as fighters. ”

Similarly, some struggle with the idea of a ‘cancer journey’ despite it being language the NHS uses. “But some liked the concept of travelling along a road with different points where you can stop. We found there was a lot of individual variation so our menu aims to provide people with more choices and options and stimulate new and creative ways of talking about cancer.”

Cancer metaphors from the menu These are some of the words anonymous cancer patients felt comfortable using to describe their experiences in the Lancaster University research. Fight “I respect cancer and never underestimate the power it has, but, if you can face up to it and hit it back head on, you stand a good chance of beating it for a bit longer.” Invasion “Initially, cancer feels like an alien invasion. It is as if you want to strip off your body and get a new one. Then in time, you ‘connect’ with it somehow.” Journey “Cancer is a hard journey with many twists and turns. No two people go through the exact same route. It’s like driving a horse-drawn coach without the back wheels. It’s helpful to occasionally stop, rest the horses and review the situation with someone you are close to.” Music “Cancer is part of me. The cure for cancer is accepting it, to heal is to convince the cancer cells to sing in tune with the rest of the body.” Nature “Cancerous tissue is like a garden that has become overgrown with weeds. The weed-killer also damages the healthy plants, but you hope they will re-grow.” “My way of dealing with cancer is to bend with the wind.” Relationship “Having cancer is not a fight but a relationship where I am forced to live with my disease day in, day out. Some days cancer has the upper hand, other days I do.” Rides “Imagine it a bit like a scary fairground ride – it might be scary in places, but it will eventually stop and you can get off. Be strong, be brave and we will be here to hold your hand if you need it.” Rocks “The rocks in our path are easier to handle when we’re in it together. The best people to help you are the ones who have been there before you or are heading there with you.” Stones “I compare life after cancer to walking with a stone in your shoe. If you let the stone rest right under the sole of your foot, it hurts every time you take a step and it is hard to move forward. If you can manoeuvre the stone to sit between your toes, it is still there but you can walk the fine line of life without hurting.”

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My mother’s cancer journey ended

My mother was diagnosed with Stage 4 Pancreatic Cancer in December 2017. By 2020, she was cancer-free. But the cancer returned with a vengeance and doctors used the word “hospice.” Here’s my own journey with her passing.

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"My WWE journey is coming to an end" - John Cena makes bold claim about his future

J ohn Cena was once the backbone of WWE when he was a full-time performer traveling with the roster on the road. Recently, The Franchise Player made a bold claim about his future and addressed the eventual end of his journey as a wrestler.

Almost two decades ago, John Cena got his big break in the Stamford-based promotion and became the hottest star in professional wrestling. After years of wrestling, he transitioned into a Hollywood A-Lister and donned different hats as he started a new journey outside of wrestling.

Sadly, Father Time will come for John Cena, as no one can outrun it. During an interview with People Magazine , the former 16-time World Heavyweight Champion made an interesting claim about his future, saying he aims to remain physically active into his late 80s or 90s.

"At 47 now, my goal is to be physically active until I can't. I put a number in my head of like, I'd like to be physically active into my late 80s or 90s. To do a parallel squat in my late 80s."

He also acknowledged that his WWE run will soon come to an end.

"I know my WWE journey is coming to an end, but fitness was a part of my life long before the WWE journey started," he stresses. "Fitness will be a part of my life, hopefully as long as my heart's beating. So the WWE has been a great chapter in my life - it's year 23 for me - and the sun's setting on that chapter in the book, but fitness will never not be a part of my life." [H/T: People]

John Cena was last seen on WWE RAW after WrestleMania XL

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A dejected John Cena left the arena and didn't appear for the promotion until WrestleMania XL. The Cenation Leader returned and assisted Cody Rhodes by taking out Solo Sikoa.

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