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ego trip in American English

Ego-trip in american english, ego trip in british english, examples of 'ego trip' in a sentence ego trip, trends of ego trip.

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Definition of ego trip

Examples of ego trip in a sentence.

These examples are programmatically compiled from various online sources to illustrate current usage of the word 'ego trip.' Any opinions expressed in the examples do not represent those of Merriam-Webster or its editors. Send us feedback about these examples.

Word History

1967, in the meaning defined above

Dictionary Entries Near ego trip

Cite this entry.

“Ego trip.” Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary , Merriam-Webster, https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/ego%20trip. Accessed 2 May. 2024.

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What’s So Bad About an “Ego Trip”?

What does it mean to accuse someone of being on an “ego trip”?

Let’s start with the concept of “ego.” In the original Greek definition of the term, “ego” basically refers to the self, or “I.”

In the Freudian version of the term, “ego” was part of a triad of ego, superego and “id.” Id referred to the mental realm of untamed emotions, urges and instincts; superego referred to the conscience; and ego referred to the mind’s connection with reality.

I’m not trying to promote Freud’s theory, but simply to point out the two contexts in which this term has generally been used: reality orientation, and self.

So basically, to be on an “ego” trip is to be concerned with self and reality. What, exactly, is wrong with that?

It’s interesting how the person who objects to somebody’s “ego trip” has little problem with the concept of a self. Such people are more than happy to concern themselves with their own interests, desires, selves and egos. In fact, to assert one’s own ego in the condemnation of another’s actions is itself an act of egoism, or an ego trip. By what standard of moral purity do you attack something while exercising that very thing yourself?

Instead of being honest and saying, “I object to you spending your mind’s energy and your time doing such-and-such,” they try to “make” you feel guilty by condemning you for having an ego at all. Instead of making a rational case for what’s mistaken in your actions, they go right for emotion: the emotion of guilt.

This is precisely the same tactic people use when attempting to intimidate you by calling you “selfish.” The person who feels shame over being called “selfish” never stops to consider that the person condemning him or her as selfish is, by that very act, advancing some set of interests, values or options the accuser personally and selfishly holds dear.

In other words, if I call you “selfish” and therefore bad for spending your time doing what you want to do instead of spending your time on me – on or something else important to me (world poverty, the good of the community, the family, whatever)– then I’m contradicting myself in my very act of moral condemnation and intimidation.

In effect, I’m telling you, “Shame, shame” for being concerned with your own interests while in the process using that condemnation to advance my own values, interests and opinions. How does that make any sense?

It’s precisely the same game when somebody accuses you of being on an “ego trip.”

The falsehood here is that it’s always and automatically bad whenever you’re doing something that you wish to do, by your own standards and for your own sake.

People think of “ego trip” and they immediately think of a person looking in the mirror, obsessing on him- or herself. They confuse this image with the proper definition of ego, which is a rational orientation towards oneself and reality.

Anti ego-trip moralists take it for granted that any attempt to advance the self is by definition always wrong — other than, interestingly, their own attempts to advance their own selves and interests.

It’s entirely possible that what you’re doing is wrong, irrational and not even in your own objective interests, as well as harming other innocent people. But in such a case, it’s not your “ego” that’s to blame. It’s not your orientation to self or reality that’s to blame. It’s just the opposite: Your refusal to look at reality, at your own objective interests as well as the impact on other innocent parties, that’s the problem here.

Of course, the person accusing you of the “ego trip” is bypassing any rational or objective argument against what you’re doing. Instead, the person making this accusation is going right to a hoped for response of guilt on your part.

The end result is one of two things. One, you stop doing something perfectly legitimate – yes, in your self-interest, but perfectly legitimate – for no reason other than someone else doesn’t want you to continue.

Or two, you stop doing what you indeed should stop doing, but for the wrong reason. Instead of stopping it because it’s against your interest (something self-destructive, as in drug abuse), you’re stopping it solely for the sake of others.

So the next time somebody accuses you of being on an “ego trip,” reply by saying: “And what exactly is wrong with that? My ego is myself, and my orientation to reality. How am I violating either of those things by doing what I’m doing?”

The burden of proof must be on the person making the accusation – and not on you.

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ego-trip noun

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What does the noun ego-trip mean?

There is one meaning in OED's entry for the noun ego-trip . See ‘Meaning & use’ for definition, usage, and quotation evidence.

Entry status

OED is undergoing a continuous programme of revision to modernize and improve definitions. This entry has not yet been fully revised.

How common is the noun ego-trip ?

Where does the noun ego-trip come from.

Earliest known use

The earliest known use of the noun ego-trip is in the 1960s.

OED's earliest evidence for ego-trip is from 1969, in It .

ego-trip is formed within English, by compounding.

Etymons: ego n. , trip n. 1

Nearby entries

• ego-surf, v. 1995–
• ego-surfing, n. 1995–
• EGOT, n. 1984–
• egotheism, n. 1856–
• egotism, n. 1715–
• egotist, n. 1715–
• egotistic, adj. 1859–
• egotistical, adj. 1825–
• egotistically, adv. 1812–
• egotize, v.
• ego-trip, n. 1969–
• egranulose, adj. 1884–
• egredient, adj. 1635–
• egregious, adj. ?c1550–
• egregiously, adv. 1553–
• egregiousness, n. 1606–
• egress, n. 1528–
• egress, v. 1578–
• egression, n. ?a1425–
• egressive, adj. & n. 1651–
• egret, n. 1411–

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Meaning & use

Entry history for ego-trip, n..

Originally published as part of the entry for ego, n.

ego, n. was first published in 1891; not yet revised.

Revision of the OED is a long-term project. Entries in oed.com which have not been revised may include:

• corrections and revisions to definitions, pronunciation, etymology, headwords, variant spellings, quotations, and dates;
• new senses, phrases, and quotations which have been added in subsequent print and online updates.

Earlier versions of this entry were published in:

A Supplement to the OED, Volume I (1972)

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OED Second Edition (1989)

• View ego in OED Second Edition

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Citation details

Factsheet for ego-trip, n., browse entry.

• Relationships

One Way to Deal With Someone on A Power Trip

Hint: many who throw their weight around don’t feel all that powerful..

Posted September 17, 2019 | Reviewed by Ekua Hagan

Sure, there are people out there who like to use power to control other people—that’s pretty much the definition of a power trip. But is your boss, coworker, ex-friend, or estranged relative really one of them?

Not necessarily.

Not everybody who seems to be on a power trip actually is. Even the most controlling, domineering person in your life may simply be… protecting herself.

Self-protection isn’t the only alternative explanation for an apparent power trip. But it’s one that’s often overlooked.

If you can spot self-protection in action, you’re more likely to respond effectively and even potentially help the person heal.

The Power of Self-Protection

Most of us, if we’ve been hurt badly enough in the past, will prioritize doing whatever it takes to stay emotionally and physically safe.

Some of the behaviors we use as a shield can easily be mistaken for something more aggressive. Here are just a few examples:

• Dictating the details of how things play out to make sure we don’t get hurt again
• Requiring lots of information upfront before we agree to do things
• Changing our minds after agreeing to something that makes us nervous
• Reducing or eliminating contact with people who feel dangerous

All of these behaviors can come across as power-tripping. But self-protection is not about enjoying power; it’s about trying to ensure safety.

Sometimes, self-protection requires us to remove ourselves from certain relationships. There are various ways of doing this, ranging from “ ghosting ” (disappearing without explanation) to having a respectful conversation in which we clearly state our needs and boundaries in a way that others can choose to act on, or not, with the understanding that we hope they’ll be able to do so.

Mostly, when we’re in self-defense mode, we’re not especially polite. We might come across as unreasonable, stubborn, or even aggressive.

Think about it: If you’re at a backyard barbecue, and your shorts catch fire, you’re going to make a beeline for the swimming pool without concern for whose Coke you knock over. While you’re dashing to the pool, your only thought is for your own safety.

Even if we don’t feel especially powerful, our self-protection can make us look like power-hungry control freaks.

Refusing to return someone’s phone call, from their point of view, is just rude. Even if the truth is we’re scared of what might happen if we talk to them.

Leaving relationships, or acting inconsistently within them because of our own ambivalence, can come across as a power trip because we’re controlling the contact schedule. Sometimes we’re available; other times, we’re not. We decide from moment to moment what we can tolerate.

To the person on the receiving end, we’re just messing with them.

How to Respond

If you’re on the other side, looking at someone who appears to be on a power trip, there are some questions you might consider. To your knowledge…

Has that person experienced physical harm, emotional pain, or deep disappointment in relationships?

How secure does he seem, in general? How’s his overall self-image ?

Is it possible that the “power trip” is really just a need for safety?

If the relationship is important to you, don’t skip over self-protection as a possible explanation for behavior that appears power-driven.

If it might be the case that the person is protecting himself, how can you help him feel safer, especially in the relationship you share?

Here are a few ways to provide safety for people who’ve been hurt and/or traumatized in relationships:

• Ask permission. Ask about timing, locations, activities, topics that are OK to discuss… anything that the person seems anxious to control. These are important to her, so let her decide what feels OK.
• Offer choices. Same as above, and let the person know you’re open to hearing her ideas and preferences. Respect her choices, as long as they don’t directly violate your personal boundaries.
• Don’t push. Fear of being dominated often goes hand in hand with concerns about safety. Never try to coerce someone who’s been traumatized into doing what you want them to do.
• Be patient. Intrusive self-protective behaviors stem from past harm, not malice. People need time, understanding, and acceptance in order to heal.

These behaviors represent the opposite of what most of us feel like doing when someone is throwing their weight around. It’s human nature to want to push back against anything that feels like an inappropriate power-grab.

So if the relationship is not that important to you, you may choose simply not to deal with someone who seems to be on a power trip.

But now that you know it could be something deeper, you can make an informed choice about your own response.

Tina Gilbertson, LPC, is the author of Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child and Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings By Letting Yourself Have Them . She hosts the Reconnection Club Podcast for parents of estranged adult children and offers consultation by distance.

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Ego Tripping

18 pages • 36 minutes read

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Summary Overview

“Ego Tripping,” also known as “Ego Tripping (there may be a reason why),” is one of American poet Nikki Giovanni’s most well-known poems. Giovanni first published this poem in 1972, which is the year that also marks Giovanni’s first trip to Africa, three years after the birth of her son. As the title of the poem suggests, this poem is a fulsome celebration of the many facets of Giovanni’s identity as a Black woman. Written at a tumultuous time in American history, “Ego Tripping” contains deeply personal discussions of pride and identity that reflect the poet’s notions of self; as well, the poem is full of highly political commentary reflective of the changing ideas around race and gender that correspond with the Civil Rights Movement and second-wave feminism.

No rhyme scheme or meter pattern is observable in “Ego Tripping,” but for many readers, the rhythm of the poem is its most memorable feature. When this poem is read out loud, the irregularity of the lines and the breaks give the words a musical quality that is at once catchy and unpredictable. Some contemporary music artists, for example, consider the rhythm of “Ego Tripping” as a precursor of sorts to the music genre of hip-hop—a comparison that Giovanni herself embraces, as evidenced by her own “Thug Life” tattoo. Both accessible and profound, “Ego Tripping” offers readers a point of entry into Giovanni’s complex world view.

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Poet Biography

Nikki Giovanni was born Yolande Cornelia Giovanni, Jr. in 1943 in Knoxville, Tennessee. As a poet, an educator, and an author of children’s literature, Giovanni has published over 24 collections of poetry and essays and 11 books for children. Giovanni often illuminates matters of race and gender in her work, and the tone and subject matter of her writing has evolved over the decades of her long career. Giovanni began writing poetry after she graduated from Fisk University in 1967 to cope with her grief when her grandmother died. Later, emotions like rage and frustration characterized much of her work as she began to contribute to the Black Arts Movement, which took inspiration from the Civil Rights Movement and the Black Power Movement. Giovanni revealed her political beliefs in her poetry, which led many critics to believe her to be an activist as well as an artist during the 1960s and 70s. Later in life, Giovanni wrote about her experience as a mother as well as other topics, and these reflections led to her works for children and adolescents.

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Over her long career, Giovanni has won many awards and accolades, including a Grammy for a spoken word album titled The Nikki Giovanni Poetry Collection , a Maya Angelou Lifetime Achievement Award, and seven NAACP Image Awards. In 1973, Giovanni’s autobiography Gemini was a finalist for a National Book Award. Giovanni has also long been recognized as an advocate for other Black artists, especially writers whose mediums include hip-hop, spoken word, and slam poetry.

Currently, Giovanni teaches at Virginia Tech where she is a University Distinguished Professor in the English Department. The day after the mass shooting at Virginia Tech in 2007, Giovanni delivered an address to the university community, encouraging resilience amongst the grieving students and faculty. Giovanni has also taught at Queens College, Rutgers University, and The Ohio State University.

Giovanni, Nikki. “ Ego Tripping .” 1974. Academy of American Poets .

“Ego Tripping” is a rhythmic celebration of the speaker’s power and pride in both her African heritage and her womanhood over eight stanzas. The poem features unusual capitalization , as only the personal pronouns “I” and “My” are capitalized despite the presence of many proper nouns throughout the poem.

The poem, written entirely in the singular first person, begins with a declaration of the speaker’s birth, which takes place “in the congo” (Line 1). As the speaker tells her life story, she takes credit for accomplishments like the construction of “the sphinx” (Line 3) and “a pyramid” (Line 4).

In the second stanza, the speaker takes note of a moment when she sat on “the throne” (Line 8), drinking with “allah” (Line 9). She claims that both she and her daughter “nefertiti” (Line 12) are goddesses, establishing herself as a “beautiful woman” (Line 15) who is proud of her identity as well as her offspring. Alongside these accomplishments, the speaker calls herself “bad” (Line 7), using the adjective in its slang form to state that she is, in fact, “excellent” and/or “remarkable.”

The third stanza contains a description of the speaker’s extraordinary travels over “the sahara desert” (Line 17). Thanks to her incredible strength and power, the speaker completed the journey “in two hours” (Line 20), identifying herself as “a gazelle so swift” (Line 21).

In the fourth stanza, the speaker names one of her sons, “hannibal” (Line 24). According to the speaker’s descriptions, he is as impressive as his goddess sister, giving his mother “rome” (Line 25) as a present for Mother’s Day one year.

The speaker asserts herself in the fifth stanza as a divinely powerful being who “turned myself into myself and was / jesus” (Lines 30-31). She describes her sons, Hannibal and Noah, with pride before describing, in the sixth stanza, the rich resources like “diamonds” (Line 35), “uranium” (Line 36), and oil (Line 41), that she has bestowed upon humanity. The speaker describes sailing “west to reach east” (Line 43), taking her around the world. On the way, her thinning hair trails gold across the continents.

In an increasingly abstract culmination of the poem, the speaker concludes with two brief stanzas that affirm her divine perfection and strength. . With words that vault herself ever higher, the speaker asserts that one can only comprehend her “ethereal” (Line 47) perfection with her permission. The final stanza of the poem concludes with a line punctuated by ellipses, slowing down and almost soaring away as the speaker muses that she can fly “like a bird in the sky…” (Line 51), ending the poem mid-thought. 

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Ego Trip: Rediscovering Grace in a Culture of Self-Esteem Paperback – January 28, 2014

Purchase options and add-ons.

Is loving yourself really the solution to all your problems?

In the world of popular psychology, there are few things more protected or indulged than that fragile little trait known as self-esteem. Today, it’s not the sin of pride we worry about, but the sin of not liking ourselves enough.

In Ego Trip , psychiatrist Glynn Harrison takes aim at what has become one of Western society’s most entrenched ideologies. He charts the rise of this ubiquitous value, arguing that the “science” underlying it is flawed, that there is little evidence efforts to promote self-esteem work, and that, in its popular form of “boosterism,” self-esteem promotion comes with hazardous and unwanted side effects.

Is there a more biblically and psychologically secure approach to big questions of significance and worth? Dr. Harrison asks.

You will be intrigued, challenged, and quite possibly freed by his conclusion: compared with the failed ideology of self-esteem, the gospel offers the foundation for personal significance and meaning.

• Print length 208 pages
• Language English
• Publisher Zondervan
• Publication date January 28, 2014
• Dimensions 5.5 x 0.5 x 8.38 inches
• ISBN-10 0310516544
• ISBN-13 978-0310516545
• See all details

Editorial Reviews

About the author.

Glynn Harrison, MD, is Emeritus Professor of Psychiatry at the University of Bristol, UK, where he was a practicing consultant psychiatrist and Chair of the Department of Psychiatry. He speaks widely on issues of faith and psychology, neuroscience and psychiatry. He is married to Louise.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.

Rediscovering grace in a culture of self-esteem.

BIRTH OF AN IDEOLOGY

On Saturday, November 22, 2003, just twenty-six secondsbefore the end of the game, England bagged the Rugby WorldCup with a last-gasp drop goal by Jonny Wilkinson. The crowderupted, sworn enemies hugged in jubilation, and grown menwept. A hero was born. Since first walking on to a rugby pitch asa youngster, here was everything the young Jonny Wilkinson hadbeen working toward. It should have been the greatest moment ofhis life. And yet within hours he was "tumbling out of control."

What happened? In his book, Tackling Life , Wilkinson tellshow for years he was haunted by anxiety. Stalked by insecurityand self-doubt, life was like a game that he couldn't win. Insteadhe found himself chained to a treadmill of achievement in whichyou are only as good as your last kick. The better things were, themore he had to lose.

Many of us have experienced similar feelings. Like JonnyWilkinson, we try to feel better by being better. And then, stuckon a treadmill of achievement and addicted to other people'sapproval, we just keep on running. So could this be a problem with"self-esteem"? And could we learn to feel better about ourselvesmore generally by thinking differently about our goals, our achievements,and our efforts?

THE ACHIEVEMENT GAME

The first person to coin the term "self-esteem" was WilliamJames, an American widely credited as the "father of modernpsychology." And, like Jonny Wilkinson, James linked the waywe feel about ourselves to the way we think about our goals andachievements in life.

Born in 1842 to a well-to-do New York family, young Williamwas something of a polymath. His interests straddled thefields of philosophy, medicine, and the emerging discipline ofpsychology. The family were all high achievers: William's father,Henry, was an exponent of the Swedish Christian mystic EmanuelSwedenborg; Henry Jr, William's brother, was a budding novelist.The family travelled widely and enjoyed a refined and cosmopolitanlifestyle.

But William battled with mental health problems and, despitegraduating in medicine from Harvard, he never practiced as a doctor.Instead he decided to take up psychology. A prolific writer andachiever, his works are a potent reminder that psychology was thenonly slowly emerging as a separate discipline from philosophy. Infact, James also founded the philosophical school of pragmatism and he is widely credited with inventing the term.

James was interested in the feelings generated when we evaluateor assess our achievements. In his view, the human mind prizesachievement above all else, and the more successful we are, thebetter we feel about ourselves generally. He taught that, if you taketime to observe your thoughts and reflect on your attitudes, yousoon realize that, like Wilkinson, you are an evaluator . We constantlyscore or "rate" our achievements as a means of scoring andrating ourselves as whole people ("I'm a hopeless communicator,so I feel like a hopeless person"; "I'm a great hockey player, one ofthe best, so that makes me a pretty awesome person").

As the scoring game gradually settles down into an overallpattern, James taught that this produces a more general "self-feeling"or "emotional tone of feeling." In other words, although onany given day your feelings can go up and down, depending onhow well the scores are going, over time they will merge to createan "average tone of self-feeling" in an "I-just-feel-hopeless-about-myself"sort of way or an "I'm-a-living-legend" sort of way.

This doesn't apply to any old achievements, however. We haveto be competent in areas that matter to us. If you've always wantedto be a football player, it's no use discovering that you are a greatballet dancer. Hence, James said, self-esteem depends on the ratioof our actual achievements compared to our expectations: ourhopes, dreams, and ambitions. The more our achievements lineup with our dreams, the better we feel about ourselves.

This doesn't mean that self-esteem is set in concrete andcan't be changed. James believed that, if you really want to, youcan change your feelings by changing the way you think aboutyour achievements. It's no use trying to feel good about yourselfby looking in the mirror and telling yourself you are a wonderful,marvelous, loveable you. James didn't believe in boosterism.To change your feelings about yourself, he said, you either haveto bring your achievements into closer line with your dreams ormodify those dreams: what you're aiming for in life.

Take the example of our football-aspiring ballet dancer: youcan either stick with your goal and work harder to achieve it ("I'mgoing to work at kicking this ball until my feet drop off"), or youcan change your goal and the way you think about it ("Hey, balletdancing is pretty cool after all and I don't care what other peoplethink").

Either way, James opened the door to the possibility that self-esteemis something that we can change by focusing on the way wethink about our goals and aspirations. So he would probably haveadvised somebody like Jonny Wilkinson to stop aiming for a perfectscore, modify his ambitions, and go for something more realistic.He would never have suggested that he should try to boostself-esteem by rehearsing statements such as "You are special." Andhe would have been shocked by the manner in which feeling goodabout yourself, regardless of your achievements, became the big"must-have" of the later part of the twentieth century.

THE EGO GAME

With the dawn of the twentieth century, however, James' popularitybegan to wane under the growing influence of the Austrianneurologist and psychoanalyst Sigmund Freud. Although Freuddidn't actually use the term "self-esteem," he had a great deal to sayabout how we come to adopt negative and positive attitudes andfeelings toward ourselves. But instead of linking these self-feelingswith our achievements in the "here and now," Freud focused ontheir origins in early-infant development: the "there and then." Inother words, if you want to help people who struggle like JonnyWilkinson, you have to get them on the couch and back to theirchildhood roots. Freud taught that positive and negative feelingsabout ourselves depend crucially on what happens to us in earlychildhood. In particular, they pivot on the outcome of momentousstruggles between different "bits" of the personality that takeplace at that time. What did he mean?

Freud's model of the human mind is best pictured as threecompartments: the id, the ego, and the super-ego, connected bytubes, with psychic forces flowing between them. Freud knew thatthese structures don't actually exist in the brain, but insisted thathis model helps us to understand how the different operations ofthe mind relate to one another.

The id is the most primitive compartment and develops first.To understand the id, just take a look at how babies and infantsoperate: "I want, I need, I must have, not tomorrow, not even infive minutes' time, but NOW." The id is all about me. It has onesimple operating principle, or rule, summed up in Freud's conceptof the "pleasure principle": to get its own satisfaction. Described asa "dark inaccessible part of the personality," the id is driven by rawaggression and irresistible surges of desire for sexual gratification.

The id wants to rule the world, and, if it could get its way, wewould feel very good indeed about ourselves. But of course a worldpopulated by unfettered ids would be a nightmare wasteland ofrape, pillage, and destruction. So the instincts and demands ofthe id need to be toned down, which is where our parents comein. When little Harry screams, "I want, I need, I must have, nottomorrow, not even in five minutes' time, but NOW," his id hitsthe buffers of his parents' discipline. He discovers that the promisedice cream stays in the fridge and he is invited to spend fiveminutes on the naughty step.

So here we have the beginnings of feeling bad about ourselves.It is this experience of parental discipline that develops andbuilds Freud's second compartment of the mind, which he calledthe "over-ego" or "super-ego." This is the place where little Harryabsorbs the standards, ideals, expectations, and rules of his parents.Over time, as he absorbs his parents' rules and strictures, heeven comes to adopt them, as if they were his own idea in the firstplace. In other words, his super-ego takes over from where mumand dad left off and operates as its own "moral policeman." And,as we shall see, the super-ego is very good at making us feel badabout ourselves.

But surely the id, possessing the sheer brute force of its aggressionand the intoxicating seduction of sex, wins out every time?Not so, because the super-ego has a secret weapon up its sleeve: thepowerful, crushing emotion that we call guilt . If we dare to yieldto the id, the super-ego tips a bucketful of self-condemnation rightover our heads. The super-ego can make you feel terrible aboutyourself. And here, according to Freud, is the root of "feeling badabout yourself." Too much guilt, too much super-ego, and we growup nursing an aching sense of negative self-feeling. Or, as we wouldsay today, we grow up with low self-esteem.

Most of what I have described so far takes place at an unconsciouslevel. The third compartment of the mind, however — theego — is the conscious part. The ego sits between the id and thesuper-ego and acts as a kind of referee. As the ego tries to relate tothe outside world, its task is to balance the "inner beast" of the idagainst the moral sensitivities of the super-ego and come up witha working compromise. That's not easy of course, which is why,according to Freud, we often feel like a walking civil war.

The poor old ego. Why doesn't it simply get crushed underthe weight of the guilt that the super-ego doles out? Well, theego has a secret weapon of its own: the infant's natural tendencytoward "grandiosity" or, as Freud put it, his "narcissism." Infantsare naturally grandiose, Freud said, tending to view other peoplepurely as supply-lines for the needs of their id. So when the superegodoles out a bucketful of guilt, the infant's natural grandiosityacts as a sort of buffer to lessen its impact and smooth things out.And then, with the passage of time, the ego moderates its narcissisminto something more rounded, what Freud called "positiveself-regard."

Good self-regard is a kind of protective mechanism. As theysteer a steady course between the outrageous demands of the idand the punishing expectations of the super-ego, people with ahealthy dose of positive self-regard hold their heads up high. Infact, over time, they even take the demands and expectations ofthe super-ego and reshape them into their own "ego-ideals" ormoral standards. And that makes them feel even better aboutthemselves. And here we have the basis for what some later called"good" self-esteem.

Let me give an example. Dad may look very angry indeed andtell us that, if we ever tell a lie like that again, we will miss our puddingand be grounded from using our computer for a whole week!Ouch. The super-ego takes the point, doles out a helping of guiltand condemnation, and we slink away with our tail between ourlegs. The message is clear: Don't tell lies because bad things happenwhen you do. Over time, however, the ego shapes the guilt-ladenstricture: "Don't tell lies or else ...," and turns it into somethingmore positive, such as, "Be a person of integrity and self-respect,and that's how you will win friends and influence people." Andthat makes us feel much better about ourselves.

So Freud's contribution to the idea of self-esteem was to suggestthat, despite all the disgusting effluent spewing forth fromthe id, we develop a more positive moral view of ourselves bynurturing positive "self-regard." Decades later, when psychologistsbecame interested in the concept of self-esteem, many drewon Freud's positive self-regard as their basic model. Here was theinspiration for the modern idea that "thinking positively" or "feelinggood" about oneself is the key to defeating guilt and self-blame,overcoming low confidence, and finding significance and worth.Forgetting William James' emphasis on the way we think aboutour achievements in the here and now, the focus shifted to Freud'semphasis upon the past, and to the warfare that takes place withinthe personality. To this way of thinking, unless something is done,those exposed to overly harsh parental discipline, or who harborunrealistic "ego-ideals," seem doomed to low self-esteem forever.

THE INFERIORITY GAME

Freud had many disciples and his ground-breaking ideas spawnedseveral different schools of psychoanalysis that took differentdirections. Alfred Adler (a fellow Austrian), for example, becameincreasingly interested in the way in which those power dynamicsthat Freud said operate within the personality (between the idand super-ego) also operate between people (not least betweenhim and Freud!). In fact, Adler's interest in politics, and especiallythe power struggles in contemporary movements such as socialismand feminism, provoked him to develop much further Freud'sinterest in themes of power and control.

It was Adler who coined the popular notion of the "inferioritycomplex." In the infant, he said, the adult's all-controlling powerprovokes a deep sense of inferiority. Simply put, adults are big andbabies are small, and that makes us feel bad about ourselves. Thoseinferiority feelings have a positive function, however, because theygoad the infant forward toward mastery and success. It is a determinationto "join the adult club" and defeat inferiority that spursthe infant on in his thirst for knowledge, competence, and wisdom.For Adler, the genius of early feelings of inferiority is thatthey motivate us to do and be our best.

But of course it doesn't work that way for everybody. Somechildren, landed with parents who undermine rather than nurturetheir fledgling confidence, get saddled with an "inferioritycomplex." And there's another twist to this sorry tale too. Somechildren over-reach themselves in the fight back and put on a false"front" of superiority. The result is Adler's "superiority complex,"the bloated personality that shares many of the features of Freud'snarcissist.

So Adler was another key foundational thinker for the self-esteemmovement. His narratives of early-infant power struggles,and the resulting inferiority complex, fed directly into our modernassumption that negative self-feelings are rooted in early-infantexperiences of harsh and humiliating parents. And his superioritycomplex paved the way for the idea of "fragile self-esteem":a prideful, over-assertive, and overbearing façade ("chip on theshoulder") that is supposed to mask a turmoil of inferiority lurkingunderneath.

THE SHRINKING GAME

Just as contemporary power plays and rivalries helped to moldAdler's thought, personal struggles with power and dominationsculpted the thinking of the psychoanalyst Karen Horney too. Inher case, it was authoritarian men such as her father (and not leastFreud himself) who provided the catalyst to her creative thought.And like William James, her frequent bouts of depression fuelledcuriosity into the origins of her own feelings of inferiority.

Horney was a Freudian at heart, so once again she takes usinto the distant past of early childhood. Like Adler, she focusedon the infant's sense of isolation and helplessness in a potentiallyhostile world. Horney was particularly interested in the way inwhich some parents' behavior can lead a child to doubt her basicapproval and acceptance. When this happens, Horney said, thechild comes to perceive love and encouragement as "contingent"or dependent. In other words, we only feel okay about ourselveswhen other people seem okay toward us. As a result, we grow upfeeling insecure and react to the world with fearfulness or "basicanxiety."

But, like Adler, Horney believed that the self fights back. Themost common fight-back mechanism is what Horney called the shrinking self . In this case, the infant surrenders before war canbe declared, and waves the white flag of capitulation in the faceof the slightest threat. Such children grow up to become adultswith weak and insecure boundaries, living to satisfy other people'sexpectations. This is the sort of person who invites you to a gourmetfeast for Sunday lunch by offering an apology for her cooking.The shrinking self is deeply insecure and dominated by worthlessness:a classic case of what we now call "low self-esteem."

The expansive self , on the other hand, says that you have tostrike first. In other words, before war can be declared, the infantlaunches a pre-emptive strike. These children, said Horney, growup to be dominating, know-it-all, "conquest" personality typeswho need to control those around them. Here we have a pictureof the tetchy and defensive shop-floor manager, bald and 5 feet5 inches tall, aggressively relishing the power he holds over otherpeople's lives, or the kind of person for whom the smallest criticismlaunches an armada of self-justification. These are classic cases ofwhat would later be called "fragile self-esteem" or, in popular language,having a "chip on your shoulder."

Horney's unique insight was to spot the importance of consistentand non-contingent parental love that offers "unconditionalacceptance." Where this is missing, we have another root of whatwould later be called low self-esteem.

Product details

• Publisher ‏ : ‎ Zondervan (January 28, 2014)
• Language ‏ : ‎ English
• Paperback ‏ : ‎ 208 pages
• ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0310516544
• ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0310516545
• Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 6.7 ounces
• Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.5 x 0.5 x 8.38 inches
• #2,477 in Christian Salvation Theory (Books)
• #6,467 in Christian Social Issues (Books)
• #14,177 in Christian Devotionals (Books)

About the author

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Alter Ego 2024 (Atlantic City) | Resorts Atlantic City

Get ready to be blown away at Alter Ego, a spectacular concert happening at Resorts Atlantic City on May 25, 2024. Located at 1133 Boardwalk, Atlantic City, NJ, 08404, this event promises to be an unforgettable experience for all music enthusiasts. The lineup for the night will feature an electrifying selection of songs that will have you on your feet and dancing the night away. From soulful ballads to heart-pounding beats, Alter Ego guarantees a night filled with top-notch entertainment. Mark your calendars because tickets for this one-of-a-kind concert will be available for purchase starting from March 30, 2024, at 04:00, until May 25, 2024, at 22:00. Don't miss out on this incredible opportunity to witness the magic of Alter Ego live in action. Get your tickets early and secure your spot at the hottest show in town!

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Meaning of guilt/power/ego trip in English

Guilt/power/ego trip.

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said when you tell someone, or agree with someone, to keep something a secret

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Saudi Arabia’s Vision 2030 Is Too Expensive For Tourists – And Everyone Knows It

Josh Corder , Skift

May 1st, 2024 at 9:31 AM EDT

Fancy a stay in the heart of Arabia? It'll cost you.

Josh Corder

Are Saudi Arabia’s new tourism offerings too pricey? That’s the sentiment on the ground at the Future Hospitality Summit (FHS) in Riyadh this week.

Between now and the end of the decade, 320,000 new hotel rooms are expected to open in Saudi Arabia. According to Knight Frank, 82% of those new rooms are in the luxury and upscale segments. And 66% of Saudi’s current 149,400 rooms are also upscale and luxury.

Saudi eventually wants 70 million international tourists to come visit. But it was only in 2019 that it opened for tourism at all. Saudi had 27 million international visitors in 2023 – many of them came for religious travel rather than stays at newly-developed leisure hubs.

‘Ego Projects Are Going Away’

Radisson’s regional vice president of development, Elie Milky said on a panel at the summit that “ego projects” by private investors are becoming less prevalent.

“Emotional and ego investments are going away. We need to be in line with the tourism strategy but we need to help it in not only promoting five-star categories,” Milky said. “It’s too risky for some investors to go into a place with a five-star hotel. It might be a nice idea for a five-star hotel, but you might not see return on investment.”

Many developments are being funded by Saudi’s Public Investment Fund (PIF). Chaired by the crown prince Mohammed bin Salman, PIF owns and develops tourism sites such as Neom, Diriyah Gate and The Red Sea – three leisure destinations with a swell of luxury facilities.

“Giga-projects” are being built solely with five-star hotels. Some of them are planning to cap visitation as well, making it even tougher to accommodate 70 million visitors.

The Red Sea is one such example: The Maldives-like project along the Saudi coastline is planning to open 50 luxury hotels. The plan is to open 16 hotels by 2025, and another 34 before 2030.

To date, every hotel announced there has been a luxury name.

Despite costing billions, The Red Sea is going to chip in one-seventieth towards achieving international tourism goals. The site will limit visits upon completion to protect the environment.

‘Mid-Markets Democratize Travel’

With luxury projects not moving the needle much in achieving visitor goals, hotel developers are hammering for more economical brands.

At another session at the summit this week, Wyndham’s regional MD, Panos Loupasis said: “Saudi will become exclusive. That’s a problem. If you want to attract people, and have them come again and again, visit more cities, it can’t be so exclusive. Three-star hotels are enablers for travelers. They democratize travel.”

“The market is not well-educated in mid-scale brands. There seems to be a strong focus on luxury in Saudi,” added Leva Hotels CEO JS Anand, a Dubai-based operator serving mid-scale.

“Not everybody will pay $2,000 a night,” he added.

The CEO of a privately-held hotel developer and owner had similar thoughts. “Mid-market hotels are the core accommodation in any city. A lot of people in the segment are just looking for glitz and glamor rather than a real investment strategy,” said Tashyid Urban Development CEO Falih Motasim Hajaj.

Luxury First, Mid-market Second

Accor is one of the biggest players in growing Saudi’s tourism and hospitality infrastructure. The French operator wants an additional 45 properties with more than 9,800 rooms by 2030 in Saudi.

In the major locations like the giga-projects, these will be luxury hotels, according to Accor’s Group Deputy CEO and Premium, Midscale & Economy Division CEO, Jean-Jacques Morin.

“Luxury is in the big leisure projects – Neom, Red Sea, Diriyah and so on,” he said. “We are by far the largest operator in the holy cities as well… While in second-tier cities we have a strategy for premium, midscale and economy.”

Are There Any Mid-market Hotels Opening Up in Giga-projects?

There are a few mid-market hotels, but they mostly act as lodging for incoming consultants, contractors and architects. The Red Sea has Turtle Bay hotel to put up staff in, while Trojena – one part of the Neom project – has a Hampton by Hilton up and running.

Even this hotel is commanding high rates as the only hotel for business people to use in the area.

“In terms of today, converting mid-scale hotels will drive super-normal profits,” said Hilton’s Managing Director, Development, Middle East & North Africa, Amir Lababedi. “As much as we can, we will convert existing buildings. Trojena has no hotels that any contractor can use. That’s why we brought the Hampton.”

He added that Hilton is looking at many of Saudi’s existing budget hotels as options for its new Spark brand.

Elsewhere in Neom, Oxagon has a Yotel on the way, again designed mostly for professionals.

How Many Annual Visits Saudi Projects Expect by 2030 :

• The Red Sea: 1 million
• Amaala: 500,000
• Trojena (a part of Neom): 700,000
• Sindalah (a part of Neom): 876,000
• Neom altogether: 5 million
• Diriyah: 50 million (including domestic day trips)

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Tags: diriyah , middle east report , neom , saudi news , Saudi Tourism , The Red Sea

Photo credit: Riyadh

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Alter Ego 2024 (Atlantic City) | Resorts Atlantic City

Get ready to be blown away at Alter Ego, a spectacular concert happening at Resorts Atlantic City on May 25, 2024. Located at 1133 Boardwalk, Atlantic City, NJ, 08404, this event promises to be an unforgettable experience for all music enthusiasts. The lineup for the night will feature an electrifying selection of songs that will have you on your feet and dancing the night away. From soulful ballads to heart-pounding beats, Alter Ego guarantees a night filled with top-notch entertainment. Mark your calendars because tickets for this one-of-a-kind concert will be available for purchase starting from March 30, 2024, at 04:00, until May 25, 2024, at 22:00. Don't miss out on this incredible opportunity to witness the magic of Alter Ego live in action. Get your tickets early and secure your spot at the hottest show in town!

Provided by Maran | Published May 2, 2024

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Screen Rant

Janelle brown reunites with these sister wives kids after garrison’s tragic death.

Sister Wives star Janelle Brown met up with some familiar faces during a recent trip to North Carolina, proving her family is always there for her.

• Reuniting with her loved ones, Janelle Brown remains strong after her son's tragic death.
• Janelle's family, including Aspyn, Mitch, and Paedon, provide support during this tough time.
• Following a family funeral, Janelle relies on support to navigate grief in the latest season of Sister Wives.

Sister Wives star Janelle Brown is reuniting with some of her nearest and dearest as she deals with the tragedy of her son, Garrison Brown’s, death . Janelle, who spent more than 30 years married to Kody Brown, has been going through one of the most difficult periods of her life. After divorcing Kody, which came after an incredibly tough back and forth that left Janelle with few choices outside of leaving her husband, Janelle was trying to find her way. Though she’d gotten her footing, tragedy struck in the form of her son’s death, leaving the star searching for solace.

"Aspyn, Mitch and Paedon are in town."

In a recent Instagram post, Janelle shared that while in North Carolina, she met with a few of Christine Brown’s children during their trip through a new town. “Aspyn, Mitch and Paedon are in town,” Janelle posted.

“Such a fun Sunday!” The group, which included Aspyn and Mitch Thompson, Paedon Brown, and Janelle’s daughter Madison Brush with her husband Caleb Brush, posed together in front of a classic brick building, and Sister Wives fans flooded Janelle’s comments in support of the outing. “Lovely picture. Happy Sunday!” @surjsandhu commented, while @jcg864 shared, “So good to see your smiling faces!”

20 Best Reality TV Shows Right Now

How is brown family mourning loss of garrison.

While things have been difficult for the Brown family since Garrison’s tragic death, they seem closer than ever after his untimely passing. Janelle, who’s been focused on keeping Garrison’s memory alive and spending as much time with her family as possible, has been doing everything she can to keep her spirits up. After learning about the horrific events of Garrison’s passing, Janelle has rarely been without family, traveling to North Carolina to stay close to Maddie and her growing family as she keeps herself busy. Janelle’s other children, including Gabriel Brown , have been spending tons of time with their mom.

Garrison’s funeral, which featured a beautiful ceremony by the US National Guard , was a family affair as Christine, Kody, Robyn Brown, and Meri Brown were all in attendance along with Garrison’s 17 siblings. Though the family has chosen to keep the details of Garrison’s celebration of life private, it is possible that there will be some discussion of the ceremony on Sister Wives season 19 , which is capturing the aftermath of the tragedy on camera. Janelle, who has been relying on her family to keep her strong in this difficult season, has been open about her feelings throughout this process.

With Garrison’s death still fresh in the family’s consciousness , everyone has been working hard to keep each other distracted and moving forward, so as to not let their grief suck them in. Janelle, in particular, has been spending time with her children and grandchildren , doing her best to keep her head above water as she navigates this difficult time for herself and her kids. Though she may not have support from her ex-husband, Janelle’s family has been taking care of the Sister Wives star as best they can.

Sister Wives is available to stream on Max.

Sources: Janelle Brown /Instagram, Janelle Brown /Instagram

Sister Wives

Sister Wives is a TV series created for TLC that follows Kody Brown and his four wives as they raise their eighteen children and tackle the challenges associated with their massive family dynamic and the stigma that comes with their way of life.